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 well jodi wanted me to come down and watch all the kids tomorrow. i feel horrible that i am not. but at the same time i don't want to do any favors for my dad. how mature huh? im trying to be mature and i act like i am to everyone but in this situation, i am not. my family has always been a little disfucitional, but its definately taken to the extreme now. 
i need to quit thinking just about me and think about other people too. but i can't just seem to imagine myself hanging out there without getting depressed.
i just feel so bad for jodi and everyone in that house =/ 
everysecond i am alone or not occupying my mind with other activities i feel like all i think about is how sad i feel about the whole situation. 
i've definately overbooked my sechdule. i usually don't make plans very far in advance, and i don't have so much going on like i do now. i make plans with someone WAY to far out in advance and forget about them and make plans that conflict, =) i think i need a planner.
i just have to keep telling myself to forget about it and focus on the good things in life. because there is so many good things in my life. this situation will make me a stronger person than i am now. 
i do miss my siblings a lot though.!! i wonder how they feel!!! i can never see them because i am at work and when i get off my dads home. i could come on fridays, bit i am selfish and don't want to be in that house. i do feel bad that i haven't seen elisabeth after her surgery, because after all she is still my little sister. i'm sure she understands,.. well at least i can only hope she understands ;)

poor jason is sick. he's been coughing horribly all night the past few nights, and he can barely breathe out of his nose. he took the day off work today. i think he wanted to play his call of duty more than rest and get better =) but i still love him anyways.
 i bought damn fabric softener instead of laundry detergent!!!!! i didn't know that fabric softener didn't clean clothes! i feel stupid! so now mine and jason's clothes are getting very soft in the washer but not clean! at least they'll smell like lavender.

Jul. 25th, 2007

01. Birthplace: bremerton
02. Planned baby: a happy surprise
03. Birth date: may 18
04. Any siblings: 2 of each
05. Younger or older: im the oldest
06. Hair color: brunette
07. Hair length: to my shoulders
08. Eye color: hazel
09. Shoe size: 8
10. Mood: bored
11. Smell: air?
12. Height: 5'4"
13. Lefty/righty: lefty

01. Do you remember your first real relationship: yes.
02. Do you believe in love: yes
04. Shortest relationship: a month? if that
05. Have you ever been heartbroken: nope
06. Have you ever fallen for a friend: yes. jason
07. Have you ever told them: were together now. so i'd assume so
08. Are you afraid of commitment: no
09. You ever had a secret admirer: no
10. Do you believe in love at first sight: lust
11. Ever been in love: yes, right now
12. Longest relationship: 1 year and 10 months, still going

01. Love or money: Love
02. Hard liquor or beer: hard liquor
03. One-night stands or relationships: relationship
04. Television or internet: tv
05. Pepsi or Coke: coke
06. Wild night out or romantic night in: romantic night in
07. Colored or black and white pictures: black and white
08. Phone or in person: in person
09. AIM or MySpace IM?: none

01. Have you ever been caught sneaking out?: yes. with fannie back in the day!
02. Have you ever skinny dipped?: nope
03. Have you ever done something you regret?: yes. but ive learned from it
04. Have you ever bungee jumped?: no
05. Have you ever been on a house boat?: yes!
06. Have you ever finished an entire jaw breaker?: only if gobstoppers count?
07. Have you ever been streaking?: no
08. Have you ever run away?: no
09. Have you ever caught your parents doing it?: uh, lets just say i dont like bambi anymore

01. Are you missing someone right now?: no
02. Are you German?: no
03. Are you Irish?: yes.
04. Are you French? no.
05. Are you Italian: no
06. Are you Norwegian?: no.
07. Are you Indian?: no
08. Are your parents still married?: no, they never were

01. Best friend?: jason and ashely and eli
02. What do you do when you're together?: stuff. eat mostly 
03. Do you have the same interests?: yes, thats why they are my besties
04. Do you have low self-esteem?: no
05. Do you get depressed about things easily?: nope
06. Do you live life to the fullest? yes!
07. Are you comfortable with the way you look? yes.
08. How do you dress?: first my pants. then my shirt
09. Are you scared of growing up old and alone?: kinda. but i dont think it will happen♥
10. What do you want to be when you grow up?: a teacher
11. Do you prefer indoors or outdoors?: outdoors
12. Are you a vegetarian?: no
13. Current song you're listening to: the tv

Repost this as "The history of (your name)"

 i can't sleep because i took a long nap at jasons house tonight. =)
work wasn't terrible today. only 3 more days until vacationnnn!! i don't think i like the new girl. i try but its hard! haha. after work i hung out with jsaon. i ended up falling asleep for about an hour as soon as i got to his house. after i woke up we watched highschool musical! it was good. haha. then we played my new mario 64 game and i went home. 

yesterday we saw chuck and larry with chandler and teresa. it was pretty funny. =) i love that guy from king of queens. hes halarious. jason and i decided to be pigs and we got popcorn, twizzlers, whoopers, and a cherry icee. =) teresa also bought me chocolates from germany!! i haven't tried them yet. they're at jason's and we keep on forgeting about it. before the movie jason picked me up from work in his sisters suv and it was leaking!! it was weird. it felt like it was sprinkling on us beacuse i guess the windsheild wasn't sealed all the way or something.. it was weird. 

oh! on friday i went bowling with the family. it was pretty fun. i definately suck! but i broke my record score of 69 and i got 107, i think! i can't believe that i don't remember the exact score but i definaltey broke 100. yay! then eli and josie and i played mario kart a few times until jason came. we bowled some more. after we were all obviously done. jason persuaded jodi to take 20 of his bucks and go bet it all on one hand on black jack. she was already drunk so she said yes. i went with her and she won the first one.. and only won 5 bucks! we were confused. hahah. then we decided to do it one more time. and left with 50! it was weird. so jason and i decided to buy a new ds game! haha. he got some dumb game and i got stupid mario 64 its too hard!!

oh and josie told me i was beautiful today. =) that made my day.

i haven't been to work in 6 days! and i have to open tomorrow. its going to suck. i hope pam is opening! i love pam. shes so nice. or cyndi.

so i slept over at jasons house last night. it was fun. i beat paper mario! haha. the first game ive ever beaten except for halo, but that doesn't really count. i love love love lvoe jasons new dog. its a pom named jack. and i am in love with him. so we just played with his dog and hung out. it was fun. 

Jul. 14th, 2007

yuck! i have pink eye! its so sick!!! the only good thing is, i didnt have to go to work today!! but ugh. i hate it. i was puking and had a migrane on top of it. so i just slept all day. i hope its gone by tomorrow though! i doubt it. i wanted to go to seattle. and i dont want to go anywhere until its all gone because i cant wear my contacts and i look terrible!!! haha.

yay!! eastern washington in a few weeks!!! excited. just getting drunk and hanging out with my favorite family members, including jason. =) it should be amazing.

Jul. 9th, 2007

i went swimming with jasons sister and her husband on sunday. their friend that we went to spiderman came too. we all went to wildcat lake. it was definatley a lot of fun. maria and shane had this big blow up thing that all 5 of us could fit on. we also brought out a little 2 person raft. it was fun. but we were there for only about 2 hours because the raft started deflating.. and the hose tape that jason bought from the gas station wouldn't stick in the water!!! WTF? we definately thought that would work. but it didnt.

i also dont like little bitches stealing stuff of my page!!!!!!!!!!!


today i hung out with m i s s ashleyy! we had a picknik at lions field. and we had this huge sandwich. it was so big that we couldn't finish it. so we threw the rest to the birds. we tried to give more to the ugly birds because the seagulls were so mean to them!! haha. but they were vicious. then we just played with her dog lillie. took some photos, and decided to get them developed at costco. i love costco. maybe ill go work there again. i wish that my scanner would work so i can put them on my myspace =)

then i made dinner, curry chicken, with eli. and got baskin robins with my love. =) we both watched his show the getbackers,, haha. and ended up falling asleep.

and tomorrow... should be good. going to see harry potter with eli before it comes out!! yay!!! im excited. be jealous!


Jul. 6th, 2007

so my fourth was good =) i went to jasons in the morning and i just read my book and he watched his anime. .haha. then we went to my grandpas. i finally decided to go down the big grass hill with jason in the wagon. (a raido flyer with big dirt bike like wheels on it) it took a lot for me to go down. and i didnt like it. i was screaming my head off and we almost went into the creek. then jason tried to stand up on the wagon and fly down. uh, not a good idea. he went about 2 feet and flew off. then we played croquet. uh. after jason won that. kerri got there and wanted to play baseball. so we all decdied to go down there. i ended up seeing a snake in the grass and no longer wanted to play, since snakes are the worst. it was such a nice day too =) after like 4 hours dad finally decided to cook the steaks. and eli, rachel, kerri and i played aggrivation. and i happened to win. so we pigged out on steaks, clams, corn, potatoes, deviled eggs, just about everything. 
and jason and i left to pick up eric and go back to his house. i was sad that i didnt get any apple pie. but thanks to boo boo,. as soon as we got to his house he realized he forgot his raybans. so i went up to get them for him. and i got some delicious apple pie!! 
then i hung out with jasons fam and eric. we all decided to have some rum and coke. jason put WAY to much rum in my coke. it was literaly rum with about 3 tablespoons of coke. it was bad. and we lit fireworks, well, jason and eric lit fireworks. haha. 

i saw transformers yesterday with booboo and eric. it was so good. i didnt know how i would feel about the movie. but i loved every minute of it  =) 

Jun. 28th, 2007

so i have been playing a lot of tennis lately. until i got shin splints. ugh. they suck. jason and i were basically playing for 2 hours on monday and tuesday. i was a little sore from monday but i decided to play anyways on tuesday, and that made it worse. but i won ONE match!!! out of all 30 we played all together i won one! jason was mad! haha. so he wanted to rock, paper, sissors to see who really won. hes such a nerd.
but im pretty much happy about life about that one. 

opening at work this week hasn't been too bad. i've been getting tired at like 10ish though! it sucks. the other day i went to bed at 9:30! i haven't dont that since i was 10! honestly. but my days are much longer. and i get work out of the way asap. except i HATE cleaning the damn store for and hour and a half. its crazy. im glad micheal agree with me about certain someone'S at my work!! 

jason and i were at walmart yesterday picking up stuff for my dad. and i went to the front to get a cart and ran into miss ashley! i also met jason's EX girlfriends mom. haha. akward. he called her "auntie" because filipinos call everyone auntie. so i just figured that she was a friend of his mom's but. no! haha. its funny because i met her dad too. hahahah.!!

so i had some cheapo wine with kerri and jodi today. all i have to say is... interesting.

i got a raise at work! so exciting. from 8.00 an hour. to a whopping 8.35 an hour. but i guess it will add up, kinda.. 100 hours is an extra 35 bucks. haha. =) oh well, money is money $$$. 

i am already getting bored now that im out of school. jason got a new job, so i dont get to hang out with him during the day because hes out in belfair!! =( and jessies gone. and ashley works. boo hoo. so i've just been reading books and tanning. and i covered someones shift today.

i have to get my wisdom teeth pulled this summer!! im soo scared. i guess i am going to be awake when they do it. they better give me a lot of laughing gas and numb my mouth. and play very loud music so i can't hear them drilling into my bones!! eek!! i dont want to think about it. but i get to get a week off of work. i guess thats the only plus. im so scared!!!!!